Gedicht

no

think i´ll still get my chance
meeting the Angels of Godjudgement
when i´m
dead, finally

only

when They reach deep into my soul, groping Their way
into my darknesses in search of
love gentleness kindness mercy FORGIVING understanding

what will happen is this (i´m sure)
all moments being one in Heaven
all information being concentrated in this one
infinitely condensed ultimately bright
Everywhere and Everything
seeing everyone else, and being asked to forgive
now = forever
in the All-at-once

i´ll get a glimpse
of cheney, bush

mumbling around trying to justify
nobody else but themselves

i will laugh

i just know, i won´t be able to stop it

and this one merciless ironic FRIGGING laugh
of sarcastic hilarity

will do it
will tip the scales

because i´ll have failed to forgive understand
in this one crucial moment

and i´ll be
done for
fucked, finally

spending eternity in hell
praying

too late, as it´ll be
finally